I penned a guest blog post about what it’s like to evaluate unsolicited manuscripts at a publishing house. Check it out on my friend Claudia Osmond’s Real Talk blog: https://realtalk.blog/2018/06/18/rejection-perspective3-joanna-karaplis/
Posted in Uncategorized
I’m proud to introduce you to my new picture book: Chester Gets A Pet! It’s based on the whimsical, award-winning furniture of Vancouver artist Judson Beaumont. You may have seen his installations in airports, libraries, hospitals… all across the world!
Chester is a young chest of drawers (based on this real work of art) who wants a pet more than anything else. When he stumbles upon a litter of baby coffee tables, he can’t help but smuggle one home. But can he keep his new pet a secret from his parents?
You can check out Judson Beaumont’s installations for this book at the Vancouver International Airport and Vancouver Kidsbooks.
Installation at YVR. Photo: Judson Beaumont
Display at Vancouver Kidsbooks. Photo: Judson Beaumont.
Get your copy directly from McKellar & Martin Publishing Group online, or at a bookstore near you.
Posted in book launch, books, Chester Gets A Pet
It’s November, but after the last two years of half-hearted NaNoWriMo attempts, I learned my lesson and didn’t even sign up this year. On the bright side, I’m 80k words into my current work in progress. (Except that many of those words will need to be changed in the second draft…) I haven’t touched it since mid-summer, but it’s been calling to me louder and louder lately.
This week I got a new laptop and installed Scrivener, so now I really have no excuse not to be writing. However, computers are a great tool for procrastination… instead of writing, here’s how I spent my first night with my new toy:
Doesn’t Sir William look thrilled?
Then I thought Sir William might enjoy modelling more if he had a sweet new outfit to show off, so I got him ready for the holidays:
Reindeer-kitty!
You can see that Comma got into the fun, batting the jingle bell dangling from Sir William’s tiny little antlers.
… it’s only mid-November, guys. This is going to get way worse before it gets better. Oh well, as long as I find some time to squeeze in a bit of writing in between all the photo sessions…
Posted in my kittens, NaNoWriMo, writing
Battered and bruised, I have just returned from my first Tough Mudder event. Last year, I ran the Spartan Race and the Warrior Dash, both of which were fun introductions to obstacle racing. I also trained at The O Course, which in my opinion is tougher than your standard 5K mud/obstacle run.
Tough Mudder is a couple of levels up, because it is 3+ times longer and has some pretty challenging obstacles, including those involving ice water and electricity. Whereas shorter obstacle courses take me about an hour, Tough Mudder was four hours of pain and exertion.
The Tough Mudder website includes details of the various obstacles and forums for exchanging tips and strategies, so this post will focus on what I learned as a first-timer, in hopes that it may be useful for some. (Or that it will remind me how insane it is to do something like this voluntarily!)
That’s all I can think of for now. Oh, and after your glorious post-race shower (the real one, not the cold one at the race venue), remember to clean your ears, too–you’re sure to find mud!
Posted in Uncategorized
Today, the Association of Canadian Publishers‘ digital arm, eBound, posted an interview with me. I may be a little biased, but I think it makes for interesting reading. Click here to find out my thoughts on marketing books online, ebook development, and what the best kind of interactive children’s media is.
And how’s my creative writing going, you ask? Well, my New Year’s resolution was to continue writing every single day, and so far I’ve only missed 4-5 days this year. A story that I started writing last April is now sitting at 65,000 words–and I missed a few months of daily writing in 2012, so that’s less than a year’s work. It’s gratifying to see how small daily habits can add up to big accomplishments.
A friend of mine recently started a blog, and in one of her first posts, she shared a favourite phrase: “What you do all the time matters more than what you do once in awhile.” I’m officially adding that to my list of mantras, right after “A clean house means you have too much time on your hands” and “Clowns are not funny, they’re downright creepy.”
Posted in ebooks, interview, social media, writing
Last week, I heard a podcast from CBC’s The Current discussing a YA trend dubbed “sick lit”: books that glorify illness and harmful behavior (cancer, suicide, cutting, etc.). One of the examples discussed was Thirteen Reasons Why; another was The Fault in Our Stars. (I’ve read both; my thoughts about them are on Goodreads.) The heart of the conversation was whether these novels glorify harmful behavior and encourage depression. Do young readers need to be protected from books that might leave them feeling hopeless, or, worse, like they should hurt themselves?
These discussions around appropriate YA literature seem to come up a few times a year. In 2011, it was the Wall Street Journal’s “Darkness Too Visible” article that ignited passionate discussion about what dark, edgy stories could be doing to impressionable youth. (Click here for a good summary of the controversy.) And last year, there were many articles wondering whether the popularity of The Hunger Games trilogy was a good thing or not, considering that the premise is young teens fighting each other to the death. (Discussed here, here, also here.)
Full disclosure: as a young teen, I went through a kid-dying-of-cancer stage. I practically cleared my local library out of all the books starring a young protagonist dealing with her mortality along with all the other issues of adolescence (namely, does my crush like me back?). I branched out into books narrated by a teen whose sibling had died (either suddenly, usually in a car accident, or slowly, from illness). And then I devoured series after series of teen horror fiction (usually by R.L. Stine, Christopher Pike, and D.E. Athkins)–those books were littered with teen corpses by the end. Had I stumbled on a book about cutting, I’m sure I would have read it. However, despite my macabre tastes, I was an optimistic and well-adjusted teenager.
As a YA author, I have not written anything that could conceivably be called sick lit. Yet. But there are all sorts of stories that appeal to me, and I appreciate the story-potential of the darker side of life. After all, without conflict and adversity, there’s no story to tell.
For example, if I start telling you about my trip to the grocery store yesterday, you immediately assume that something went wrong–there was a really long line! Someone was rude to me! I saw a celebrity! I ran into my ex with his new wife and baby! If I tell you that I just bought some bread and eggs and left, you’re going to conclude that I’m the most boring person you know. The author’s job is to tell a good story and to tell it well. Period.
Therefore, if one thing is certain, it’s this: authors will continue to write all sorts of stories, teens will continue to devour the ones that resonate with them, and reviewers will continue to attack and defend trends in YA literature.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must get back to my work-in-progress about a teenage girl who is battling leukemia while trying to solve the murder of her best friend, who was also her first crush. And a vampire.
My publisher just sent me this great TV spot featuring McKellar & Martin Publishing Group! It was part of CBC’s “Cultural Secrets of Vancouver” series, and it stars spoken word artist Shane Koyczan, editor-in-chief/publisher Tonya Martin, and CEO/publisher Meghan Spong. And of course it features McKellar & Martin’s excellent list, including Fractured!
My book is ready for its closeup!
Posted in Fractured
My friend (and talented author) Helene Boudreau recently posited that spammers might be more successful if they mastered proper grammar and spelling. I immediately thought, “Now there’s a business opportunity!” I imagined myself selling my editorial services to spammers, for my usual hourly rate plus a small cut of whatever profits their new and improved scams brought in. Unethical? Perhaps. But hey, a writer’s gotta make a living, right?
Thankfully, I hadn’t yet crafted my pitch letter when another friend posted this article: Scammers Intentionally Write Lousy Emails. That’s right–those emails are hilariously illiterate on purpose. Why? Because if you’re not the type of person who sees lots of spelling and grammar errors as a red flag, you’re more likely to fall for the scam. (“Wow, I can’t believe this person from Nigeria is really going to trust me with $20 million! Sucker!”)
Oh well. I suppose I’ll just have to keep my day job. And continue writing on the side. (At least I’m churning out around 10,000 words each month by sticking to my Don’t Break the Chain pledge, which I started in March. Go, me!)
As a currently dogless dog person who happens to have two cats (still following?), I feel I’m in a good position to offer some advice to fellow dog people who, for whatever reason (don’t worry, I won’t judge… you poor bastards), find themselves adopting or wanting to adopt a cat.
Cats are furry four-legged companions, but their resemblance to dogs often ends there. So here’s what you should be prepared for when you bring kitty home…
How to Love Your Cat Without Sustaining Personal Injury
Dogs want to please you, but cats want to be pleased by you. Hint: cats find inconveniencing you to be incredibly pleasurable. For example, Sir William wants attention only when I’m otherwise occupied. As I started this post, he started meowing and looking intently at the top of the entertainment unit, threatening to jump up there (and possibly knock over the TV). This was my cue to get up and pay some attention to him (“Sir William! Don’t you dare jump up there, don’t you even think about it!”). Satisfied, he sauntered off.
Another tip: beware a cat who innocently exposes his tummy to you. You might think, “Aw, he wants tummy rubs, just like a puppy!” But there are two options: either he wants tummy rubs, or he wants to attack your hand. You won’t know which it is until your hand reaches his belly, and by then it could be too late. You’ve got a 50/50 chance in our house: one enjoys tummy rubs; one enjoys hand-ambushes (complete with fangs and claws).
Can you tell which of these kitties wants tummy rubs and which wants to sink his teeth into your soft, fleshy hand?
Sir William wants tummy rubs... OR DOES HE?
Is Comma sleeping... or PSYCHING YOU OUT?
Oh, and remember: both dogs and cats have teeth and claws, but cats are far more willing to use them on you. And not by accident.
Noms
Some cats are just like dogs and will wolf down their food right away, but many cats will nibble throughout the day instead. As a former dog owner, it was fascinating to give the cats their kibble and watch them eat for a while, then saunter off while there was still kibble left. Trust me, that did NOT happen with my yellow lab. His policy was “eat first, determine whether it was edible later.”
On the other hand, if you drop food on the floor, a cat will sniff it, then give it a little taste, then spit it out, then repeat until they decide whether they like it or not. So unlike a dog, a cat makes a poor vacuum cleaner replacement.
Exercise is for Suckers
Dogs need to run around outside or they will drive you absolutely nuts. Cats can go either way–some (especially as kittens) need exercise and will love chasing a laser pointer or a bit of string. Others are lazy and think exercise is for suckers. Our cats enjoy a rousing game of catch-the-laser-dot or mouse-on-a-string, and they also enjoy tearing through the house around midnight or one a.m. (I think they give themselves bonus points for keeping us up at night). At least we don’t have to go out in the cold or rain just so they can pee. Advantage: cats.
Toys, Toys, Toys
Don’t waste your money. Cats like boxes, paper (seriously, shred a few sheets of paper and watch them go nuts), bags, empty toilet paper rolls, pens (or anything that they can roll, like chapstick and USB sticks), laser pointers, string/ribbon*, tinfoil balls*, and attacking anything that moves under a blanket. (Confession: I buy my cats toys all the time. Especially little stuffed mice with catnip in them, and little balls they can chase.) *Note: do not leave your cats alone all day with string, ribbon, or tinfoil balls–they may eat them, and that could means a pricey vet bill.
Sometimes, my kittens even play fetch. It’s all on their terms, though: they bring the toy, drop it at my feet, and stare at me until I throw it. They only bring it back until they lose interest (usually two to seven times).
Sir William waiting to fetch the tinfoil ball.
Training Your Feline
Bwahahahahahahahahahaha.
No, really. You can train a dog because they want to please you. Good luck with cats. The best you can hope for is that you’ll be able to get them to behave when you’re around. They’ll still wreck your shit the moment you leave.
We prevent our cats from jumping up on the counters by yelling, “NO!” but I’ve heard some people find spray bottles (with plain water) to be effective. The trick is to catch the cat in the act so that they associate their asshole behaviour with the punishment. Anyway, just keep in mind that your cat’s desire to do something is often stronger than your patience to prevent him from doing it. Pick your battles.
Protecting Your Stuff
Dogs may be able to get up on couches and beds, but cats can go ANYWHERE. Have you seen how high some of them can jump? It’s insane. You will quickly learn to cat-proof your house as if you were baby-proofing for a toddler Spiderman. They can climb anywhere and squeeze into the smallest spaces (behind the refrigerator, for example). Anything light enough to be pushed over will be pushed over. Anything that dangles will be batted at and possibly severed. Anything on a ledge or shelf will end up pushed off said surface.
Like puppies, they also tend to chew stuff. Bitter apple spray may deter wire-chewing, but unless you want to coat your entire wardrobe in the stuff, just keep your clothes out of reach. (Some favourite chew toys: tank top straps, headphones, drawstrings.)
Moody Little Buggers
What can I say… cats can be assholes. With time, you’ll learn to recognize what kind of mood your cat is in, and that will probably save you from a few bites and scratches. But still: expect cats to be unpredictable. They can go from purring as you stroke them to biting your hand.
If your cat seems pretty focused on you and his eyes are dilated, he’s probably all amped up and ready to Attack The Shit Out Of Anything That Moves. Exhibit A:
Comma demonstrates Crazy Kitten Eyes. Beware!
Some cats also hold grudges. I’ve heard of cats who display their displeasure with their owners by ignoring them or pooping in their shoes or on their bed. What jerks.
Sweet Dreams
Your cat will be at his most adorable when he’s exhausted from terrorizing you and passes out. Take pictures.
Don’t bother buying an expensive cat bed. Your cat will curl up in your laundry hamper amidst your dirty clothes instead, just to spite you.
Oh, and cats are nocturnal. So expect to be woken up at three a.m. by your cat doing one or more of the following: jumping on you, sitting on your chest, sitting on your head and chewing your hair, scratching you “by mistake” as he tears across the bed in pursuit of your other cat or one of his toys (or because he’s possessed), scratching your legs on purpose because they moved while he was stalking them, or meowing loudly about something.
Really, considering how long they’ve been domesticated, why aren’t there any diurnal cats? Get on that, cat breeders!
The Holy Grail: Dog-Like Cats
If you’re lucky, you’ll get a dog-like cat that runs to greet you when you come home, like tummy rubs and fetch, and doesn’t hold grudges. The best way to do this is to adopt an older cat so you can get a better sense of his personality (because it’s hard to really get a sense of a kitten’s personality beyond “hyper,” “insane,” and “sickeningly cute”). Or choose by breed–some breeds are more easy-going than others (I don’t know which… ask a cat person).
Any other dog people out there with cat-ownership tips to share? TELL ME. Or I will sic my cats on you at three a.m.
Posted in my kittens, other kittens
The talented Maureen McGowan (author of such hilarious fairytale mashups as Cinderella: Ninja Warrior), has interviewed me over at Get Lost In A Story. If you’ve been burning to know which stereotypical clique I belonged to in high school (hint: I wasn’t a jock), or whether I prefer salsa or guacamole, head on over!
Posted in fairytales, Fractured, interview